finally getting started on that childhood dream

I've been thinking about taking up guitar off and on for years.

I tried it once when I was like 11 or so, but gave up after a few days because I didn't realize it'd make my fingers hurt and be so much....work! I was 11 dammit, and wanted to be a rockstar RIGHT THEN!! And I didn't really want to do the work to get there...so I just gave up on that dream temporarily and moved right along to my next big idea of being an actress on Broadway, or some such ridiculousness. In my 11 year old mind I decided it would be less work as I apparently already had the god given talent of an "expressive" face and a voice that carries. (or as some might say... I was obnoxiously loud) And so I found myself in theatre from middle school until college...at which point I got too busy working a job and studying for classes to have any time for creative pursuits anyway.

But secretly deep down, I've always still wanted to be able to play and learn/write songs and be an "artist" who moves people and makes them think about life, the universe, and everything.

I've been waiting for the perfect point in my life when I knew I'd have enough time, drive, and dedication needed to get through the toughest part: the first few months of grueling pain on my fingers, the sounding horrible no matter what I do, having long pauses between chord changes, the nothing ever sounds like anything ohmygodwhydidiwanttodothis phase!

And that perfect point in my life...well frankly, is probably not now. But on a whim I bought a guitar this past Friday anyway and spent my entire Memorial's Day weekend practicing/playing my heart out. It's been less than a week and my fingers are already forming callouses and I've spent a lot of time on skype with my dad holding the neck up to the webcam asking him if I was holding down the F chord right, and why it sounded so horrible and why is music theory so complicated anyway!

But even though its hard, it doesn't feel like work. I look forward/make time to practice, and take joy in overcoming small feats. I think I just needed to want it enough, and I have that now, more so than I did at 11. My reasons for wanting it have changed and evolved and something in the past few months clicked, and I feel like its a form of expression I need to learn. I have so much I want to say with my guitar.

I'm excited about my new hobby and plan to waste away my summer throwing all my time and heart into the damn thing. Wish me luck ya'll! ...and hey. If I give it all I got and I STILL suck, as long as I learn the 4 basic chords, the rockstar thing is still a possibility!

EDIT: JUST SO EVERYONE KNOWS, JACOB RUBIN SHOWED ME THIS AWESOME HILARIOUS VIDEO. IT IS ALMOST AS HILARIOUS AS HE IS! http://shlabam.tumblr.com